White

There has been some confusion over my last post. I mentioned that I have been trying to find a therapist who is “sufficiently white”. What makes racism so complex and subtle is that it’s really about culture, not color. Check out Wiki’s article on “white people” for more information about white culture – this is the cultural strain from which I come.

Suppose I am having a crisis of faith and I have two people to choose from that I trust equally. Suppose they even have the same good advice for me. One is a Christian and the other is a Buddhist. Which one would I go to first for spiritual direction? The Christian would be able to draw on Christian themes I can understand in her advice, but the Buddhist lacks those shared themes. The Buddhist has to bridge an extra gap before he can draw on a theme I naturally understand.

What I meant is that I need to find somebody who shares my cultural values. My cultural values are, well, white. There aren’t a lot of good alternative names for it. Most other names are just embarrassed ways of saying “white” – and I am not ashamed of my ethnicity. Maybe “euro-American” or “mainstream American” would have been more apt, but really “white” makes the most sense to me.

Also, note that the example names are first names. That suggests a high level of identification with other cultures – Mohammed suggests Middle Eastern, or more likely South Asian. Girkirpal suggests Indian. Both are probably Asians, as are many of the people on the list. Second and third generation immigrants frequently receive at birth or later adopt Americanized first names, especially in professional Asian-American subcultures. The beautiful meanings of traditional names aren’t typically worth the challenge of having to explain how to spell or pronounce ”Zhi Lin” or “Randhir” – not to mention the social stigma of growing up with an unusual name in an American school, which even white people suffer when their parents are too creative.

I will be clear here. I am not a racist; specifically, I do not think race in any way limits cultural or individual achievement. I work with brilliant people from other races, other countries and other religions – I have a lot of respect for them, but I know from experience it is hard work to communicate across cultural lines. It is not racist to prefer members of my own ethnicity in situations where my own cultural identity is a significant factor, such as finding a therapist.